Men lose their minds speaking to pretty women

I heard this factoid on the NPR show, "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" earlier today, and had to find the source. 

Which I did.

As a bona fide man, I can tell you this happens to me on an all too regular basis.  I instantly transform from a relatively cogent intellectual being into Jerry Lewis at his very worst.  A blithering goofball whose brain is stuck in neutral, which doesn't really matter as my mouth instantly disconnects from all and any cerebral tissue.  The more beautiful the woman, the goofier I become.

And I know it and cannot stop myself. I have a sort of out of body experience as I listen in a complete panic as my doppelganger starts talking like a rutting teenager.  I swear to you, I cannot remember my name, where I live let alone the rules of civility.

According to this research men are genetically programmed to be complete idiots around women.  You probably have an inkling this might be true, but now you know why.

Here's reprint of an article from The Telegraph newspaper:

Talking to an attractive woman
really can make a man lose his mind,
according to a new study.

by Pat Hagan
The Telegraph
03 Sep 2009

The research shows men who spend even a few minutes in the company of an attractive woman perform less well in tests designed to measure brain function than those who chat to someone they do not find attractive.  (See, I told you.)

Researchers who carried out the study, published in the Journal of Experimental and Social Psychology, think the reason may be that men use up so much of their brain function or 'cognitive resources' trying to impress beautiful women, they have little left for other tasks. (Like making sense, as I said.)

Women, however, were not affected by chatting to a handsome man. (Now, this ain't fair.)

This may be simply because men are programmed by evolution to think more about mating opportunities. (Well, yes.  And your point is?)
". . .one researcher was so struck by an attractive woman he had never met before that he could not remember his address when she asked him where he lived."
Psychologists at Radboud University in The Netherlands carried out the study after one of them was so struck on impressing an attractive woman he had never met before, that he could not remember his address when she asked him where he lived.

Researchers said it was as if he was so keen to make an impression he 'temporarily absorbed most of his cognitive resources.'

To see if other men were affected in the same way, they recruited 40 male heterosexual students.  Each one performed a standard memory test where they had to observe a stream of letters and say, as fast as possible, if each one was the same as the one before last.

The volunteers then spent seven minutes chatting to male or female members of the research team before repeating the test.   The results showed men were slower and less accurate after trying to impress the women. The more they fancied them, the worse their score.

But when the task was repeated with a group of female volunteers, they did not get the same results. Memory scores stayed the same, whether they had chatted to a man or a woman.

In a report on their findings the researchers said: 'We conclude men's cognitive functioning may temporarily decline after an interaction with an attractive woman.'  (In plain everyday English, men are sexually driven idiots, a conclusion I simply can find no fault with.)

Psychologist Dr George Fieldman, a member of the British Psychological Society, said the findings reflect the fact that men are programmed to think about ways to pass on their genes.

'When a man meets a pretty woman, he is what we call 'reproductively focused'.

'But a woman also looks for signs of other attributes, such as wealth, youth and kindness. Just the look of the man would be unlikely to have the same effect.'
*  *  *  *  *

And she looks for signs that he has a brain.  Which at the moment of the meeting, he doesn't. 

So, ladies.  Please take pity on us poor males.  Please believe me, this is not the way men are when you're not around.  We're usually hazing each other, making rude, sexist, racist, and juvenile comments and generally acting like boys.

Sigh

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